Sunday, Monday... or is it Tuesday?

You know sometimes, you really do not know what people want from you.

I was trapped in a nasty relationship with a nasty man for the past four years.

The advantage was all for him... and I was always in the losing end... which was a bummer for me.

He would insist on coming to Singapore when I was at my busiest periods in School or for University and he would lament about how difficult it was to come to Singapore, ( as if he were doing ME a favour...) and that too, when in fact I always told him it would be better if I went to see him instead. He would throw a fit whenever I told him it was not a good time to visit, and that I had too many things I had to do.

There was one time, when he told me he would come to Eid, and spend Eid with me, but on the morning of Eid, he told me he was going to visit and spend the rest of the day with his cousin, who lived a couple streets away.

The premise of his coming was so that he could spend Eid with ME.

Fighting, Crying, Verbal Abuses - starting with what a lousy cook I was, to what a Stupid Person I was were all tip of the iceberg... and I lived in this situation for the past 4 years.

Relationships do not really mean that one person feels bad ALL the time, do they?

I mean, I have been married before, and I know that in a marriage there has to be a lot of give and take, and a whole lot of understanding. I guess, if I had interpreted the term "marriage" properly, it is companionship and supporting one another in what each partner does best and encouraging one another's dreams, and maybe taking care and caring for one another... and a relationship is a fore-runner for a marriage?

This is when I started smelling a rat.

I found out that there have been many lies that had been told on all sides, left - right - centre - upside - down.

I can not live a lie anymore.

I want out, and I have stepped out.

And then, again with the drama. Tantrums thrown from his side, attempts to patch up with MORE Lies... Screaming abusive vulgarities to me over the phone in front of his wife ( whom he told me he was divorced from, but in actual fact still very very much married...!) - and then half an hour later trying to appease me...

Where does it all end??

I want out, and I have stepped out.

...in the end, I decided that Allah's Will will ALWAYS Prevail. He Knows in His Infinite Wisdom, what I need most and WHEN I should get it, if at all I get it in this lifetime.

It is said that if we do not get what we ask for now, Allah Will Give it to us in Aakhirat and if THAT is what Allah Had Willed for me, then THAT is what I will have to accept, right?

Allah Knows Best, and in shaa Allah, I do hope sincerely that Allah will make it easier for me to accept what He Has Willed for me, and to make it easier on me. aameen...

To all those who read this note... please make duaa for me.

Sometimes it is VERY Difficult... And sometimes... just sometimes.. I do not care if it is Sunday, Monday.... or Tuesday.